Some nights the cruel ceiling condemns you,
Mocking your choices and where you’re at,
Not here, not there where you wish
To be strong takes courage and guts
You don’t have, for you are sleeping with the devil
And you’re too scared to walk away.
He beats you, hurts you, pins you down
With empty promises, and you take
Every beating like your life depends on it.
What life? He asks as he holds your hands
Chaining them to a cold wall of shame.
Your guilt for letting him in, for falling
Into a sweet trap of bottomless pit.
You forgot then how to look in the mirror
Who’s that, staring at you, begging
For mercy? Who’s that, bruised and scarred?
Who have you become?
Outside this you try to save yourself, preaching
Self love and self worth to others, but
Who will listen to a woman without worth?
Nobody will love you if you don’t, so you lie
Through your teeth and you claim freedom
You don’t even believe in. Freedom is not yours
It will never be unless you fight for it.
But tonight after you’re done inspiring those
Younger, brighter, happier girls who adore you
Your steps will drag you back to your
Broken sanctuary of cold walls and cruel ceiling.
There you will once again slip into a beautiful
Yet torn up nightgown and lie down next to your devil.